18 posts tagged “school”

I've been feeling so tired this week and I don't even know why...I'm just fed up and want a vacation for real.  I can't bring myself to focus on work at all, so I've been wasting most of my time going online, watching some stand-up comedy, and basically spacing out.  This always happens every year around this time when it's close to the holidays and the end of the semester.  Hopefully I'll manage to pull myself together enough to do a decent job on my next paper about mental illness that's due next week. -_-;

By the way, something disconcerting I've become more aware of recently is how many people find tattoos objectionable.  Of course most people from older generations who aren't used to it aren't too enthusiastic about them, but increasingly I've come across a lot of people from younger generations, even some my own age, that find them totally unappealing.  I get that not everyone finds them attractive, and that's perfectly understandable, but to go as far as saying they're disgusting or grotesque is very extreme and I found the fact that some people say such things pretty disturbing and shocking.  I suppose it's because within the social circles and scenes I'm part of tattoos are pretty common and considered a beautiful way of expressing oneself and embellishing one's body.  I mean, most of my friends and I find them very attractive when done in a nice way.  I think really cliche tattoos just picked out of a book without thinking much about it can be ugly and stupid, but if you get a tattoo that means something special to you done by a skilled artist, then it's a very beautiful thing.  I don't know, that sort of negative sentiment about them really threw me off because I usually think of tattoos as enhancing a person, not negating their other positive physical features and general attractiveness.  The same can be said of piercings, though I'm personally more picky about them.

Then again, I don't consider my values or preferences on most things anywhere near mainstream sensibilities, so I guess it's to be expected that I can't relate much.  But that does make it harder to carry on those sorts of conversations with the average person, especially in this country, because we generally have very little in common.

Ugh, I have yet another paper to write this weekend, and I have no idea how to approach it because the topic is so vague...what a bummer. -_-;  I'm also hoping to translate DELUHI's new mini-album 'Yggdalive' in the near future...I don't have time to do a full post and rant on in detail about it, but it's pretty awesome so anyone who hasn't heard it yet should go give it a listen!  Leda's guitar work is love as always. <3  There are deliciously heavy metal-inspired riffs, some seriously high powered drumming, uplifting choruses, a sweet bass solo, a few funky/popish moments, and the shockingly soft and smooth "Hoshi no nai Yoru ni".  DELUHI has really expanded their horizons beyond my expectations with this release, proving they can rock a number of different styles skillfully and naturally.  For a first effort I was surprised how well they pulled off a lot of the new influences and styles.  Plus the sound quality of their work has taken a significant step up from previous releases as well, which is great.  I also can't wait till the full version of the "REVOLVER BLAST" PV comes out.  At first I wasn't too keen on it, and it's still not my favourite track, but the full song turned out to be a lot heavier than the chorus let on.  Here's some more samples:  "Wake Up!"    "Follow the Future"    "Flow Snow"

I'm pretty excited for next week because the new coat I ordered should be arriving.  It's a really cute black and white pleated Victoria houndstooth coat by BB Dakota.  It was so much cheaper than I expected (even less than the average for a similar coat at many other, more popular brand stores...but I think they tend to hike the price) and definitely miles away from the $3,650 or so price tag on the Alexander McQueen designs it takes inspiration from. >_<  I'd actually been endlessly debating over whether to go for a black or a white coat but this one totally solves that problem.  I can't wait to wear it with my tall, black suede high-heeled boots. :D  I've been refreshing my wardrobe lately not only for the fall/winter season, but looking for more sophisticated, classic pieces, because I've realized I need to expand beyond my existing functional/casual and not-so-work-appropriate rock-inspired looks.  I need more mature, career oriented items too but it's always so hard to find my size in those areas.

In other news, the GazettE's manager posted some more interesting anecdotes today.  Apparently the band hasn't been meeting up a lot lately since they're making songs and on break, but they had a photoshoot and such recently and when he and Kai were talking about posting photos on their blogs Kai showed the manager a certain photo on his phone and Sakai asked "Is this a pro wrestler?" to which Kai said "No, it's me!" and was like "See, look!" and proceeded to flash his newly buffed-up arms!  Then the manager was all like, "Wow, they've gotten really big!" 0_0.  I knew Kai had started working out to increase his muscles (he even got a personal trainer, I heard) but now I'm really curious to see how much of a difference there is!  Is it that drastic?! o_0  Also, apparently Aoi decided to invite everyone at PSC to dinner (they made a reservation for close to 20 people, he said) and Aoi paid for them all!  Sakai was super happy and said, "What a manly thing to do!  You're the best!  Thanks!" lol ^^;

I can't believe I managed to write two 6-8 page papers in three days...and I'm quite happy with the results, though I don't know how they'll do under my professors' scrutiny. @_@  One was for art history on the presence of the idol in Andy Warhol and Willem de Kooning's paintings (which I actually enjoyed writing), the other was a more grueling analysis of the application of psychoanalysis and Foucault to the anthropology of gender...that one was pretty complex, so I'm not as confident about it.  I always find it easier and feel better when writing about the arts because they're something I believe in, whereas I tend to be very suspicious of theory.  Anyway, now I'm totally burnt out, but I still have a mountain of other work to catch up on. =_=;;

Speaking of being burnt out, I read the GazettE's manager's mobile post today where he revealed that Aoi forgot what date it was and was the only member not to send Kai a happy birthday text.  Supposedly it went like this:
あっ今日もう30日だったっけ？？まだ26日だと思ってた(笑)
Ah, today's already the 30th??  I thought it was still the 26th(lol)
あっ！！忘れてた｡まじごめん！！日にちの感覚がなかった｡
Ah!! I forgot. I'm so sorry!! I lost track of the date.

-_-;....
Aoi you mean, terrible person...apparently Kai was pretty down because he didn't get a text from him. ^^lll  Of all the members Aoi seems to have been taking their vacation to the extreme from what he said in the latest magazine interviews.  Apparently he's been spending his time doing nothing but playing video games and chatting anonymously with people on the network (in some cases finding out that they like the GazettE) and practicing guitar while waiting for his game to load.  -_-lll  No wonder he's lost his sense of time.  I do feel bad for him though, because the reason why he's been practicing guitar at home (which he said he hasn't really done before, only playing while working on composing, recording, and pre-pro) is because at Saitama Super Arena he got nervous and there was a point where he messed up and his fingers just wouldn't move.  It seems Reita covered it up for him, but he said he felt like he wanted to die in that moment (it's in Shoxx, if I remember correctly). T_T  Poor guy.  So now he's working on leveling up his guitar play and getting more serious about why certain phrases just don't come out when he's composing, which is admirable and very responsible of him, I think.

Also, totally random, but I'm going insane cause I can't get this song out of my head: Bad Romance

I really, really hate it when fire alarms unexpectedly go off late at night on cold, rainy days. -_-;  It's such a pain.  Anyway, it's kinda sad that I haven't been updating much lately since I'm buried in work and papers that need to be written.  (I'm halfway through one for my art and aesthetics class right now, actually...it's about a bugaku mask from Itsukushima.)  There are so many backed-up posts and things I've meant to talk about but just don't have time to sit down and write.  But well, as for some good news, I've pre-ordered a copy of the GazettE's new DVD!  I caved and went for the rather expensive limited edition...and express shipping, cause I'm an impatient person and won't be able to stand waiting an extra week. :3  I'm really looking forward to it, and I get the feeling this year's holiday break will be a good one. ^^

By the way, I just though I'd share a little excerpt from a recent interview with SUGIZO.  Every time I read one of his interviews I grow to respect him even more.  He's such an intriguing person and seems to have matured into a really positive, humble perspective on things (plus I love when the dorkiness of his spiritualist-hippie-activist side comes out, hahaha.)  But he really does say some nice, pretty deep things sometimes.  I admire the fact that he really wants to make a difference in the world and uses his music to achieve that.

"What is important is guiding the world to a better place, making it more beautiful. I know that I don't have that much power over things, but I know that I am better than nothing. So I do my thing through my music. It's not as though people would die without music. Food, clothing and shelter is another story, but people can still exist without art and music. But I think that without music, people's hearts would die. It is my goal to be able to help people's hearts as well as how they live in the real world." [whole article]

So I've recently come to the realization that I'm a total academic masochist.  Compared to the average four courses per semester standard I usually take five, I have a double major and just declared a minor, yet I manage to get by with good grades so I don't know, I guess I've just gotten used to doing ridiculous amounts of work. o_0  Kind of strange to be aware of it though...but I like learning and figure I want to get the most out of my time here so it never really occurred to me to do otherwise.  I have to say though, this semester's looking like it'll be one of the toughest yet...I really ought to buckle down and get stuff done...>_>

On another note, I find myself increasingly annoyed by academia in general lately...I dislike the kind of pointless, self-absorbed, unrealistic theoretical pondering that goes on sometimes; it just seems like such a waste of time and doesn't contribute anything meaningful at all.  A lot of it just seems very out of touch with reality.  One example is a paper I read last week for my anthropology of gender class in which the writer postulates on the structure of family, status and experience of women in certain Polynesian societies, yet goes on to say in the end notes that she's never done any fieldwork in the region.  I criticized the author's structuralist argument for various flaws such as looking for preconceived notions found in Western society in Polynesian culture which may not exist as such, and making certain binary claims about the concepts of virginity and sexuality that were rather narrow-minded, not to mention questioning the validity of her work which was based entirely on second-hand accounts.
To this my professor replied that fieldwork isn't a prerequisite for "significant comparative analysis and grasping the big picture"...which kind of frustrated me because I felt what I argued pretty much indicated the fact that I think it is.  How can you go around making claims about the organization and experience of people in another culture if you've never been there and seen it first hand?  At least from my experience, what you read in books and second-hand accounts is never the same as experiencing it yourself, and I think it's very important to have that understanding before attempting to make any analysis.  That kind of academic scholarship really bothers me because it's mostly just an exercise in playing with theory.

Anyway, onto more positive things...I'm looking forward to tomorrow because a classmate and I were chosen to participate in this new program run by an organization that funds scholarships and donates to our library...basically they take students out to lunch at ethnic restaurants and have them talk about the culture it represents.  They've chosen Japanese for their first outing, so we get to have a nice Japanese lunch for free. ^^  It also means we get to miss Japanese class, but unfortunately we still have to turn in all the homework the same day and I still haven't finished it yet. -_-; 

Actually, I've kind of been distracted and watching manzai instead, hahaha!  One group I've been watching a lot recently is Black Mayonnaise, they're really funny.  It feels so good to hear them speak in Kansai-ben...I miss hearing the dialect, since in academic settings you only hear the standard Tokyo accent.  It's so much more melodious and exciting to listen to.  Some manzai is really hard to understand though because they talk at such high speed with such strong accents.  But here's an interesting act of ブラマヨ's that's fairly easy to understand where they talk a bit about Kyoto (they're Kyoto natives, actually)

I've been neglecting writing about new releases for some time now, mostly because I've been busy with real life work and spending my remaining free time translating for my other blog.  But after all it's a better use of my time and there's more interest there anyway. ^^;  So right now I'm honestly just procrastinating because I'm sick of doing my crazy amounts of Japanese homework (I've been at it for most of today, slogging my way through kanji study, an essay revision, 50+ sentence translations, and a four page reading comprehension worksheet). _|¯¯|O  Why are my Japanese sensei always so insanely ambitious?  Admittedly though it does me a lot of good, since if I were allowed to just sit on my ass and breeze through the class the lack of pressure from constantly having assignments due and needing to mentally prepare for class so I won't come out of there shamefully picking up the scraps of my shattered self-esteem would mean I'd never improve.

Hm, well anyway there's a bunch of releases coming out soon from artists like ScReW, D, and heidi., although so far none of the previews except maybe those for heidi.'s new album 'Panorama' have particularly struck me.  In fact, the pv for D's new single 'Tightrope' was pretty disappointing.  The song is alright, but rather mediocre and unmemorable despite its heaviness which wins some points with me, but the worst for me was the pv.  It just looks washed out and not very well put together from a cinematographic perspective, not to mention the obvious, overdone, and trite imagery.  I think it's the most awkward pv I've ever seen from D...a lot of the members' posing is so stiff and the scenes with Asagi as the "dog" and the man flailing in "fear" against the fence are just awkward to watch.  The whole idea just isn't very original and certainly not executed as well as it could be...the whole thing comes off as being tacky and cheesy rather than aggressive or sexy.

However, D'espairsRay's new single 'Final Call' is catchy and fun, and the pv is edgy with high contrasts between the vibrant colours, light and dark.  The line "Why can't you love me, baby?!" really makes you want to sing along, as dorky as that would be. : )  The song is upbeat and somewhat similar in sound and composition to 'REDEEMER', but has a sultrier feel to it that's played up in the pv's imagery and the lyrics.  I'll be translating it as soon as I get my hands on the kanji.

On another note, I just have to say, if I wasn't already decided on getting the GazettE's DIM SCENE Final DVD, then for sure these tantalizing, gorgeous photos would be more than enough to convince me! *o*  I mean, just WOW...I have no words!

So apparently the DVD of the GazettE's DIM SCENE tour final at Saitama Super Arena will be released December 16th, and I'm thinking of getting it despite the probably fairly high cost and the fact that I currently have no way to play it due to region coding (oh, how I hate the coding system) but I've been wanting to get a multi-region player for years so maybe this can be my motivation to finally invest in one since I really want to see the live and it supports the band, of course.  So I guess I ought to start saving up for it now. ^^;  (Btw, I absolutely LOVE their new looks, especially Aoi, Ruki, and Kai! <3)

Anyway, I've finished my first full week of class and all is going well...they're very interesting, though the assignments are already piling up.  I'm trying to get three of my short 1-3 page papers (all from my art classes) out of the way this weekend before the bigger papers come up and also so the following weekends will be freed up and I can actually do other things besides just work.  My Japanese sensei said she wants us to make blogs and post about stuff in Japanese every week throughout the semester, which is an idea I like and look forward to, but also somewhat worry about since it means I'll then have to maintain three blogs, which I'd like to keep posting in regularly but I don't know how successfully I'll manage that with all my other work.  まあ、とりあえず頑張ります！

We also have a stupid p.e. requirement so I'm taking pilates, which is nice since it's less intensive than doing a "real" sport or something that involves exercise machines.  I'm relatively flexible and fit, and can walk all day without getting tired so I figured it wouldn't be too hard on me, but we had our first class a few days ago and I have to say, my "core" (basically all the internal muscles of the torso that are the main focus for this exercise routine) were unexpectedly sore afterward. ^^lll  When you're doing the exercise it doesn't seem strenuous at all or like it's working your body too much, but you really feel it later! >_<  Well, I suppose by the end of it I'll have better abs and upper body strength (we had to do push-ups!  I freakin' hate push-ups...).

Also, this is rather random, but I've recently discovered what a delicious combination pomegranate flavour Chobani greek yogurt and cinnamon Kashi Heart to Heart cereal make.  It's great, I seriously recommend it!  I was very happy to discover the new expanded store in the dining hall sells Chobani yogurt, it's all natural greek yogurt...good stuff.  Before all they had was one crappy brand that didn't taste very good and only stocked three flavors. -_-;  It was utterly pathetic.

It's weird to be back at school again.  Yesterday I moved into my new apartment and have spent most of yesterday and today running around doing all the necessary errands, getting the stuff I need, cleaning the place up and unpacking.  When I first got here the place seemed pretty spartan, but now that I've spruced it up a bit and placed my things around it looks a bit better.  I have a nice amount of space in my single room (bedroom)...about 168 sq. ft. I think, plus a kitchen and private bathroom that I share with my one flatmate.
We've been getting along well so far, and he and I are both in the strange position of having come back after a year abroad so we don't know what's going on or how things work anymore. ^^;  It doesn't help that because we're in our final year we don't know anyone from the lower two years and all our friends from the upper years have graduated.  It's kind of depressing really...I don't feel as familiar with things here anymore so it makes me want to just get this year over with and move on already.  Like a lot of people I know who've just come back from abroad we found ourselves saying, "What am I doing here?!"...even though several months have passed it's still hard to adjust to life back here not to mention the university lifestyle.  Ironically the bathroom light stopped working as soon as dark fell on our first night here, so we ended up having to use flashlights to take showers and stuff, which was odd and a pain but manageable...at least the water pressure is ok. -_-lll  I filed a work order so hopefully they'll come fix it soon.

Another saddening fact is that one of my favourite professors has gone off to Japan to do research so he's not gonna be here this year...I always loved his literature classes cause it was always the same group of people taking it so we all got to know each other well and would have really fun discussions and accumulate all these inside jokes.  Well, despite that my classes seem interesting albeit rather challenging this semester, so I'll probably be kept busy and have to work hard to keep everything together.  I'm taking some cool courses like Culture and Mental Illness, Anthropology of Gender, and of course, Readings in Contemporary Japanese Literature. ^_^v

I made a new banner from a photo of a maple tree I took the other day at Byodoin. : )  I felt it was time for a change again since spring is here, all the plants have come alive again, and the semester's finally over and all.  Last week we had our final ceremony then had lunch together, so everyone from the program was gathered for the last time...it's always kinda sad realizing you won't see the people you've been around everyday for such a long time anymore.  I mean, we're all going back to the same country, but we're widely scattered all over, so although there's plans for a reunion, it's not the same.  I really liked the group of people in my Japanese class and sensei this year...I think we were all unique, which made for very interesting interaction and discussions.

Also, I'm sad that tonight is my last night in my host family's house. : (  I really like them and it's strange thinking about how I'm no longer going to be living here when I've been in this house for almost 7 months now.  I already know it's going to take some major adjusting to get used to life back in America...it's almost like I don't know how to live there anymore, I'm so used to how things are here! ^_^;  Well, anyway tomorrow I'll be heading to Tokyo for a few days to see some friends that're studying there now and places I couldn't make it to during my first trip there.  After that I have another week in Kyoto to finish my omiyage shopping and do all the remaining things I still want to do in the area.  I can't believe I have so little time left...it's really depressing, honestly.  Though I'm gradually warming up to the idea of going home, I also really feel like I want to stay here longer.

I'll leave you with a translation I did of a Japanese folk song that some of my friends performed at the final ceremony.  It's called 'Nagoriyuki' and is one of my favourites.  Though it's very hard to express the same beauty and emotions of it in English, I did my best.

「なごり雪」
伊勢正三

汽車を待つ君の横で僕は
時計を気にしてる
季節はずれの雪が降ってる
東京で見る雪はこれが最後ねと
さみしそうに君がつぶやく
なごり雪も降る時を知り
ふざけすぎた季節のあとで
今春が来て君はきれいになった
去年よりずっときれいになった

動き始めた汽車の窓に顔をつけて
君は何か言おうとしている
君の口びるがさようならと動くことが
こわくて下をむいてた
時がゆけば幼い君も
大人になると気づかないまま
今春が来て君はきれいになった
去年よりずっときれいになった

君が去ったホームにのこり
落ちてはとける雪を見ていた
今春が来て君はきれいになった
去年よりずっときれいになった

'The Last Snow' ＊
originally by Ise Shouzou

Standing next to you who's waiting for the train,
I keep looking at the clock,
Snow is falling out of season,
"This is the last snow I'll see in Tokyo, isn't it",
you murmured in such a lonely way,
Knowing it's also time for the final snow to fall,
After a season that played around too much,
Now spring has come and you've become so beautiful,
So much more beautiful than last year,

Putting your face up to the window of the train that's started moving,
You were trying to say something,
Afraid of your lips forming a "goodbye",
I turned my gaze downward,
As time goes on, you who's young and childlike,
still won't realize it even once you've become an adult,
Now spring has come and you've become so beautiful,
So much more beautiful than last year,

Remaining on the platform you've departed from,
I was watching the snow fall and melt,
Now spring has come and you've become so beautiful,
So much more beautiful than last year

＊ The title can have many connotations, since 「なごり」can refer to the final snow of winter, the sadness of parting, or vestiges of something.

Haaah, I took my Japanese final on Friday, and was SO HAPPY to find it was easier than I thought it'd be.  I'm so glad our sensei decided to go a bit easier on us for the final, since it's 15% of our grade.  There was a manageable amount of kanji, grammar fill-ins, a section where we had to write a really concise summary of a story, and two reading passages with questions about the content, grammatical structures in the text, and deeper meaning/interpretation of it.  Now all I have to do is take the exit exam and finish my 10 page paper on shin-hanga for Ukiyo-e class. >_>

But it's nice to be able to relax for once and do things I haven't had time for in a while...for example, watching dramas! (by which I mean ones I'm interested in, not the nhk taiga dramas or cheesy morning ones that're always on tv when we're having breakfast, etc.)  A short but intriguing one I just started (and finished :P) in the past few days is called 「銭ゲバ」 ['Zeni Geba'] and stars Matsuyama Kenichi as Futaro, a man with a dark, traumatic past that leads him to be obsessed with money to the point that he'll do anything to get it.  It shows a sad, harsh side of reality and has rather deep and depressing musings on how money influences people and how it can destroy or save their lives, so it was a refreshing change from the romantic, happy-happy, love and kindness beats all! kind of dramas that are so pervasive.  And it has Matsuken in it, which is always a plus! <3

On another note, this is rather old news since it came out almost a week ago now and everyone's been talking about it, but if you haven't seen it yet, this is pretty awesome.  It's Susan Boyle's performance on 'Britain's Got Talent'...she really stunned the judges and everyone in the audience, and is truly inspiring as an example of how appearances can belie incredible talent, and people shouldn't judge others unfairly solely by their looks.  I'm not a big fan of these sorts of shows, and normally don't watch them, but I'd heard about this so I checked it out and actually found it really moving.  For once all those shallow, judgmental people in the audience (including the judges) were made speechless by an entirely unexpected performance, so it was great to watch Susan do so well.  I hope she makes it far in the competition.  Though she's not as good as a professional, her performance put in a lot more honest emotion than many actual singers manage with this song, which is admirable, and something I personally find perhaps even more important than pure technical ability.  (Actually, there was a little feature on tonight's nhk news about Susan Boyle and how widely known her appearance on the show has been made by youtube, etc.)