愛

Aaah, I can't get this song out of my head!  It's 'Ai' by Otsuka Ai off her latest album 'LOVE LETTER'.  Normally I don't listen to much mainstream pop, but I have a lot of memories of this song from Japan, since it was in a commercial on tv all the time and my host parents had the cd and loved to play it during dinner parties or in the car.  That also means it does nothing to help curb my still frequent little bouts of depression at not being in Japan anymore...I really really really miss it so much, but I know I have to move on and be 前向き if I want to make it back there, which I am determined to do.

Ai Otsuka - Ai
This really is one of those sweet, wholesome songs that melts your heart and makes you feel all fuzzy inside, haha, but I actually find 'Ai' nice as opposed to being repelled by it like I am with a lot of pop songs like this.  Maybe it's because her voice isn't "perfect" like the conventional, over-polished ideal, or the unique way she sings the song, particularly the chorus (my favorite part!), but for me it's somehow different from other sickly sweet, average pop songs.  It's a song that just feels like the happy, warm atmosphere of spring or summer, and reminds me of all the good times I had in Japan, as cheesy as that sounds.  But, if I were to be completely honest, despite the insanely hard work and going through some of the most stressful times I've ever experienced, I don't think I've ever felt as free and happy with life as I did there. 

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